The MP system in BC2 is alot more casual gamer friendly than most MP shooters. Yes you need to unlock stuff, but each class has it's own points requirements so if you like playing assault, you can concentrate on that and have everything in that class unlocked well before you're even lvl10, this allows you to have a fairly deadly arsenal even at very low levels (yes lvl10 is very low considering it goes up to lvl55 with increasing exp requirements per lvl)
My advice is to go with medic as a starter, you unlock the Med Kit and Defib very early and they are a very good source of points. The LMGs are a good all round weapon which can be made even more deadly with the later on upgrades.
As for staying alive after spawning, just spawn on a squad mate. This game relies heavily on teamwork, the option of spawning on a teammate makes it alot easier to avoid spawn campers and even allows you to spawn in past enemy defences! Not to mention the massive bonuses you get for supporting a squad member (double points)!
The only times when the entire team will end up getting spawn ***** is when there is a massive skill difference between the two teams, or worse yet if the entire team gets pushed into a corner because they all went with snipers, level difference really doesnt do much since I've come up against much lower level players with more advanced weapons than me simply because I made the mistake of trying to unlock all my classes evenly rather than focusing on one at a time :S